February 17th, 2010
Growing Up Vegetarian & Our Split Kitchen
I’m a big fan of food. I love to cook and bake, and I love eating out. One of the best things about My Prairie City is that we’re made up of so many immigrants that we have food from every corner of the world, and we’re so close to so many farmers you can eat local without even thinking about it. If you’re feeling hungry and are downtown, there’s authentic east Indian, Ethiopian, Thai, Irish pub fare, Mexican, Japanese and vegan restaurants all within walking distance. It’s my favourite part of the city, aside from the amazing arts scene here.
But maybe you and I have just met for the first time to go out for lunch, and I place an elaborate order like “club sandwich, no meat, and could you add to caramelized onions and jack cheese from that other sandwich onto it?” and we start to have a conversation that goes like this:
You: “Oh, are you vegetarian?”
Me: “Yep!”
You: “Oh cool! How long have you been at that?”
Me: “Um…well, since I was six years old.”
You: “WHAT? WHY?”
(Don’t worry. By this point I can give my speech without notes.)
My mom went vegetarian when I was six. She didn’t have a parade, but eventually I noticed she wasn’t eating the same food as me and I asked her why, and she said “animals are my friends and I don’t eat my friends”. It seemed like the most obvious thing in the world, so I asked if I could stop eating the star shaped chicken stuff and tuna that I ate, and my parents said that was fine. In terms of major life decisions it couldn’t have been more of a non-event, I was so little that I was barely eating any meat at all. I just stopped, and unless I was having sandwich meat waved in my face by the boys at my elementary school I didn’t really think about it.
Growing up in my house, what you ate was never about right or wrong, it was just a fact: some people eat different things and some people are comfortable with different things. When it comes right down to it, I guess I started being vegetarian because I never really learned how to eat meat.
This isn’t to say that I haven’t been curious. While I’ve never tried red meat, I’ve had pizza where I got a slice of peperoni instead of cheese (oh my gosh, gross) and I’ve tried chicken once. Each time I felt sick after trying meat- my body isn’t used to it and my palate isn’t either. Even cooked chicken tastes rubbery and charred to me, like what I would imagine somethings body to taste like. Beyond not liking how it tastes I find the way most animals are raised and slaughtered is just straight up awful. If I was used to eating meat I would buy local organic meat, but I’m not used to it so I don’t. I’m healthy now so my logic is why bother eating something that I don’t like and that makes me sick when I’m fine without it?
While to me this seems straight forward, you wouldn’t believe how many friends, employers, and clients have refused to accept “I don’t like it” as an answer. They barrage me with questions and get defensive. They start explaining their eating habits when I haven’t asked. I’ve had well intentioned friends freak out and try to re-order their meals so they don’t offend me by eating meat in front of me (ps – who are the vegetarians that scare people into this kind of behaviour?? Please cut it out, you’re embarrassing the rest of us!!) and I’ve had supervisors drill me about my family history, how I grew up and my politics over a working lunch.
I get it. People anticipate that I’m going to become a pushy salesmen about it, but once they get to know me and how much I love good food they start to see how my eating choices aren’t an issue, they’re something I’m positive and excited about. And they’re certainly not about anyone other than me.
Our Split Kitchen
After the big “Why?” the next thing that people want to know is how Mister dealt with becoming vegetarian when we moved in together. The answer is easy: Mister is not vegetarian- we have a split kitchen. I would never ask him to change something so fundamental as what he eats, and he has a slate of severe food allergies to contend with (corn, soy, fish, all nuts…) that mean he’ll never be vegetarian and will always have an Epi Pen. When we first moved in together we were worried about how it would work, but after the first month it became clear: cooking in a split kitchen isn’t that hard. It makes you think about cooking, and when you’re thinking about what you eat and how you make it, cooking can be a lot of fun.
How we eat is very straight forward, and it helps us to keep cooking fun and manageable:
1. We meal plan in a way that’s not a hassle. Mid-morning on Saturday we sit down and brainstorm for ideas. If I’m feeling uninspired I hit FoodBlogSearch.com and see what’s out there. Any ingredients that we know we don’t have goes on the list, and then we do a sweep of the kitchen basics and make sure we have enough of what we like to stock (milk, eggs, sugar, spinach, chickpeas, deli meats, tofu, black beans…). Ta da! Our grocery list is done. After a little streamlining this takes 5-10 minutes, or 15 if I decide to languish on food blogs.
2. We have a store of fail safe meals up our sleeves, and always stock the ingredients for them. Always. “Um….pizza?” is a common phrase in our house, especially if mid-week we’re getting tired of cooking. We have a pizza stone (you need one) and whenever we run out of dough I toss some together (15 min max), let it proof over night and then freeze it. As a result, making pizza only involves putting two pieces of dough into the fridge to thaw out during the day. We also always have stuff for croque-madames, Mexican, spicy tomato chickpea soup, and pasta. If we lived on a desert island I could subsist on these alone, and having them handy means we never have to think too hard if a recipe we picked out suddenly looks daunting mid-week.
3. We look for basics that can be built in stages so we can both eat how we like.This allows me to work from one recipe for the first half of cooking, and then split off into two dishes in the final stages of prep. Most soups and pasta sauces can be built like this, where we start with a veggie broth or a basic tomato or Alfredo sauce and at the last minute I split into two pots and add meat for Mister and tofu for me (or just leave mine as it is). Build your own pizza, Greek pitas, Mexican, melty sandwiches also fall into this category.
4. We cook like it’s Thanksgiving all the time because side dishes are awesome & everyone can eat them. Beyond our main dish we always have a couple sides, from beans, peas, potatoes, yam fries, to veg & non-veg appetizers, olive trays, rices and salads.
5. We understand the other person’s limitations. Mister used to hate veggies- but having them not over cooked and seeing that if you put butter on anything it tastes good he’s slowly come around. I am weirded out by cooking meat, but I have a morbid fascination with it and a sense that it’s kind of lame that I never cook anything meaty for Mister, so we both try to meet in the middle. It’s not a written agreement, it’s just our quiet way of trying to be a little adventurous.
6. I don’t cook scary or elaborate vegetarian recipes. A lot of veg. cookbooks have ingredients that I would love to try someday, but that day is not today. I don’t have time or energy after work to try to figure out how to use star anise in my dinner, so the only vegetarian cookbooks I buy are family cookbooks. These books cater to Moms who need fast food that their picky eaters will partake in. I have one that even gives alternate vegetable choices for some dishes based on common texture issues & has the nutritional information for everything. It’s my best friend.
Having a split kitchen isn’t the most straight forward thing in the world, but cooking with some restrictions isn’t as hard as it sounds. Now that I don’t have to grocery shop after work when I’m stressed and tired, it’s not a stressful thing. Add white wine to the equation- even less stress!
If you’re considering trying out a couple vegetarian meals a week, please don’t fall into the trap of thinking that this kind of cooking is hard. It’s simple, healthy, way less expensive and if you have a partner who is hesitant you don’t have to count yourself out.
Do you have any tips for keeping cooking simple & still keeping everyone happy with dinner?
ps – I have a post for next month brewing on my vegan experiment, if you have any questions you’d like touched on please pop them in the comments below!
I love this post! I’ve been a vegetarian for over a year and my husband and I have a split kitchen and everything you listed is exactly how we work. And your attitude towards being a vegetarian is similar to mine. I’m pretty chill about it…I just choose to not eat meat and I don’t expect anything from others. My close friends are awesome when it comes to looking out for me at restaurants and filling me in on the veggie options they’ve discovered. I’ve also gotten a few bad tomatoes that get defensive and grill me about it. But I shrug them off.
Great post! I loved reading your story.
thank you for posting this!!! my boyfriend and i also have a split kitchen (i am veg, he is very much not).
you have inspired me to try new things in the kitchen that can start out vegetarian and then split.
i am so sick of trying to make two different meals every night!
you are the best!
much love, rachel
Im so glad you posted this! We have a split kitchen at home too. I’m a vegetarian (fairly new to it, just started last year to give it try and decided to stick with it!), but my husband eats meat. Thanks so much for your “veggie challenge” post too, you gave a lot of good tips :)
Your blog reminds me so much of my own story. I have been a vegetarian since I was 5. I have a carnivore husband (and 5 yr old daughter). My son and I are both vegetarians he is 2. I have to admit the split kitchen thing was a bit easier before I had kiddos, and now with two small picky eater it is getting tricky. I am glad I found you blog!
I’m sure it’s tricky with little ones! I would really recommend you check out the family cook book I list here:
https://kylaroma.com/2010/03/friday-is-for-plan-a-challenge/
It has fabulous tips for picky veggie kids :)
Thanks for finding me, I hope you have a great weekend!
So interesting to read about your “choice”. I am vegetarian too, and I chose not to eat meat too when I was around 6 years old. I had low blood pressure and other disease due to vegetarianism. I went to the doctor, who, not being much informed, “obliged” my parents to forcefeed me with meat. I hated it, and my parents soon understood that there are many other ways to deal with those problems. (Eating meat and fish is so important here in Italy! People are not informed about vegetarianism. A few weeks ago a frind asked me “Tofu? What is tofu?” Uh..)
I became vegetarian again and now I am learning so many different things I can eat! And no more low bloodpressure or dizziness =)
And my boyfriend eats meat too, his parents still look at me as if I were some crazy fanatic girl when I say I don’t eat meat, but I think they’ll have to accept it ^^
Thank you for your story, I am curious to know which recipes you tried!
Juliette
Oh my goodness, that’s so terrible that your doctor did that! I know I’ve had doctors tell me that when I want to have kids I’ll have to start eating meat, I’m thankful to have found a family doctor who is vegetarian friendly now- though it’s a little silly that you should have to actually look for those!
I’m glad that you’ve found a way to live that fits with you you are- and my favourite veggie recipes and resources are here in case you’re still looking for them :)
This is SUCH a great post, I have been a veggie all my life as are my family and have never been tempted to eat meat ever..its just not something I think of as apealing… I hardly even bring it up but as soon as someone finds out they get so defensive about it/try and have a argument with me/tell me I’m unhealthy ‘dont I get tempted?’ ‘god how can you live like that?!’ urghh its so tiring.
Just wanted to say this post is so refreshing and you have put it into words exactly how i feel!
Fritha xo
Love love love this. And you, of course.
I recently read this post(http://is.gd/d1bpO), and watched the linked video (not for the faint of heart; I cried through the entire thing) about the way dairy animals are treated in typical dairy farms in the Midwest U.S. and beyond, and while I know there are local (kind) solutions (and I intend to seek them out if ever I need them), it’s reason enough for me never to buy an egg, or a gallon of milk, or anything else dairy-related from grocery store chains who get most of their stock from places just like the ones featured in the video.
Also: Have you read any Michael Pollan? In Defense of Food opens with “Eat real food. Not too much. Mostly plants.”
What a great post! I love how you said growing up it was never about right or wrong food choices – what a great attitude your parents raised you with!
.-= Becky´s last blog ..Ohh sweet Friday =-.
I am so glad to see that you weren’t scarred by my vegetarian decision. It’s lovely that you approach it as a non-event. It’s a choice that can be made, and it’s nothing for others to be threatened by. :)
I was vegetarian for several years and I’ve thought of going back …
also interesting :
MakingMeCranky.com > friends of mine who have raised their baby vegetarian since birth (she’s now 2+) and have gotten nothing but support from their doctor.
.-= amy t schubert´s last blog ..Last weekend in February =-.
We have a split kitchen as well. However, although I cannot imagine eating meat, I do not mind touching it. I just don’t want to put it in my mouth. But I will make meatballs and touch gross chicken with the rest of them. I think it actually makes it easier since I can touch the gross stuff and know I don’t have to put it in my mouth!
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..Visit to the Shedd Aquarium =-.
I found this so informative and interesting! I just got back from Austin and spent a lot of time with my girlfriend who has been a vegetarian for probably the last 2 years. She told met that it’s become easier for her because she’s learned how to cook vegetarian and by adding “meat” substitutes to her meals…
Reading what y’all do made me smile because, even though we won’t have a split kitchen, we do the same things, from creating a grocery list to having certain items stocked in the pantry at all times. Because, some nights it’s just easier to make pizza than to create anything else. And everyone likes pizza.
I think the main thing with us is that we just try to work together in the kitchen to create new and fun things for both of us. Because eating the same things over and over again gets boring after a while.
.-= E.P.´s last blog ..Little surprises =-.
I think you know this (?) but I grew up in a house where my mom was a vegetarian and my dad ate meat. I think that made it easier for me to become one, especially considering the fact that E is one too. We went vegan for a month–I love butter waaaaay too much–so I’m very curious to see how it turns out for you!
.-= Her´s last blog ..Now what?! =-.
Jason and I often cook for ourselves. Actually Jason cooks because he likes making healthier choices. I try to minimize the cooking and go with the quick and easy – no matter the lack of “health”.
I’m intrigued by vegans, vegetarians, etc. It has never affected my food choices when eating with one though – I like my meat. So much so it’s not uncommon for me to have meat and nothing else for a meal if I’m especially lazy.
.-= Manderz´s last blog ..Mental Block =-.
I’ve been waiting for this post, and it completely exceeded my expectations – you are such a fascinating person. Corn and peeled apples are the only fruits/vegetables Julia will eat, and I very rarely eat meat. Most of the time we will make the same meal, just with different ingredients. As it would be ridiculous for her to demand I eat steak, it would be unfair of me to force her to eat a wider variety of fruits and vegetables. I’m not her mother – we both eat what we enjoy, and it has never been an issue for either of us.
I *really* enjoyed this glimpse into your split kitchen.
.-= samdotcom´s last blog ..It’s Just Another Ordinary, Miracle Today =-.
I can’t really put my finger on exactly why I love this post, but I absolutely do. Maybe because I couldn’t imagine being a vegetarian. Maybe because I’m fascinated by this quiet peek into your everyday life. Maybe because you’re such a great writer. Or D) All of the above.
.-= nicole antoinette´s last blog ..trash, babies, and that one time i was wildly offensive but not too much more offensive than all the other times, so don’t worry =-.
Holy smokes your husband has alot of allergies! That must be so tough! Poor guy!
I think it’s great that you’ve found a way to make a split kitchen work. I love the ‘Thanksgiving approach’ – you are so right, side dishes rock!!!
Cooking in my house is pretty simple since it only happens once a week! But I make a huge amount so I will have leftovers for the week!
.-= Lisa from Lisa’s Yarns´s last blog ..Book Review: Sarah’s Key =-.
Aww! I loved hearing about your vegetarian history, and also how you and Mister handle having split diets. I think it’s really awesome that you guys are able to work around that & that it makes you creative. I also really enjoyed hearing about how you meal plan (this is something that terrifies me–I usually just wing it throughout the week, not the best idea!) and how you organize your grocery shopping. As you know this is something I’ve recently started working on–I’m learning! I am totally with you on having sides with every meal though–it makes things so much more fun & interesting! My boyfriend still trips out that I make mashed potatoes…with real potatoes. He says he’s never met anyone who didn’t insist on using instant. :D
I’m fascinated by this! While my hubby and I both eat meat, he is an extremely picky eater- so I can (kind of, but not really :) relate to having a split kitchen. I can’t wait to hear about your vegan experiment!
.-= Erin´s last blog ..A Thursday Rant & A Happy Birthday? =-.
What a fascinating story. Vegetarian since you were six. So interesting! My best friend HATES meat, she just doesn’t like the taste!
Even though I’m not vegetarian I completely understand what you mean by the concept of “split” kitchen because when me and Eric used to live together I would often make two different meals. Beef burger for him, chicken burger for me. Steak for him, salmon for me. I just like to eat healthier than him and I’m not a fan of red meat because it hurts my teeth!
Pizza is the BEST when it’s homemade and it’s SO EASY to make either vegetarian or meat versions. I actually prefer my pizza made with just veggies and I’ve become a bit of a flexitarian in the new year as I only eat meat 2-3 times a week lately. It’s much easier on the budget too!
Good post! Sometimes I wonder if I could manage to go without meat, but then I wonder what I would eat! I know that sounds so stupid, but for me, a salad as the main entree just doesn’t fill me up. I’ve tried tofu and it’s just not my cup o’ tea. Wish it were, it’s so good for you(!), but I just can’t do it. It just goes to show I haven’t really looked into it because all that comes to mind when I think of a no meat dish I think of a salad. Smack me please!
.-= sara´s last blog ..The beginning =-.
My sister has been a vegetarian/pescatarian for almost as long as I can remember. It’s always hard around the holiday’s as my parents have yet to really except this. Christmas especially as I don’t eat pork. We both love a collection of sides!! It’s amazing how many people seem offended by another’s choice when it doesn’t even effect them!
Recently, I started participating in Meat Free Monday’s and love it! I actually have to stop and think about what I’m going to eat, plan ahead. Also, I feel better. Giving the system a good weekly cleanse is so important, as is supporting responsible and sustainable food sources.
.-= Graygrrrl´s last blog ..When Is It Too Much? =-.
That was such a great (and useful) post!! I’m not vegetarian just yet but I think that’s something that I am slowly working towards. I made a cold-turkey switch back in December and it totally backfired…
I will keep your tips in mind :)
.-= Anais´s last blog ..Let’s talk about food =-.
Thanks for this incredibly informative post. That pizza tip is quite helpful! I really admire you for going vegetarian at such a young age :)
.-= Ria´s last blog ..Sunset On Steroids =-.
I’ve dabbled with being a vegetarian—I just struggle giving up fish, because I absolutely love fresh salmon and tuna. But, I am always oddly impressed whenever I meet someone who’s been a lifelong vegetarian. I don’t know why this wows me—perhaps the discipline and thought that’s involved.
Anyway, this is a muddled comment. What I’m TRYING to say is that I really enjoyed this post. :)
.-= Hannah´s last blog ..Can we please pause to consider… =-.
This was such a great post to read! I’d imagine that having a split kitchen and both of you eating such different meals would be hard, but I’m so impressed by how you made it simple and painless. I may have to try doing this with my boyfriend more!
Thanks for stopping by my blog, I’m so glad I got to discover yours!
I am a big time carnivore who doesn’t really like veggies at all. In uni, I lived with 2 live-long vegetarians. It was disastrous. I’m glad to see that it really can work!
.-= Erin´s last blog ..Erin & The Slow Cooker #2 =-.
Ive been thinking about becoming a vegetarian for a while now and this post has really inspired me to actually do it instead of just thinking about it! I think I’ll start off with eating less meat though.. Taking it slow especially because noone else in my family is veg.
Thanks!
Thanks for sharing your story (emergency pizza meals are frequent in my home as well), and thanks for popping by my blog! ;) I love your style! Would you mind if I added you to my blogroll?
.-= Ashlee´s last blog ..antiquing. =-.
Thanks for sharing! I don’t think I could ever be a vegetarian. I like my meat too much. I enjoyed reading your reasons for why you’ve chosen not to eat meat, and I also find it strange that people change their menu choice because of your choice.
.-= DeMo´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday :: kuler luv =-.
Wow that’s awesome you’ve been a vegetarian since such a young age. I actually just switched to vegetarian last year in Jan-09. I quit cold turkey overnight and I haven’t ever looked back. I know what you mean about the questions and disbelief. I get it from friends, family, and coworkers everyday.
I am a BAD vegetarian though… I work long hour night shifts all week and barely have the energy to cook anything decent. I eat waaaaay too much pre-made soy products these days.. gotta move away from that soon!
.-= Braedy’s World´s last blog ..Ill-planned, Ill-equipped, Ill-executed =-.
Wow, while all of your points sound confusing, when you think about it – it’s not at all. I like that you start out with just one recipe then divide it to add meat for him. That way you don’t have to make 2 completely separate things. You are so genius :)
We haven’t been extremely organized as of lately. Usually, when we go to the store, we’ll grab some ground turkey, chicken, and fish. Throw that all in the freezer and take it out throughout the week to make dinner. We almost always have frozen edamame, rice and spinach. I think those are basically our usual sides! As MIchael Scott would say, “keep it simple, stupid” :) Wow I am lame!
Ohh we also like to use Supercook.com if we are looking to make a meal with something we have. So, say we have eggplant, just type in eggplant – and whatever else you may have (if you want) and it picks recipes for you based on what you have :D
.-= Alyssa´s last blog ..On Crafty-ness: Easy V-day Cards =-.
Fantastic post. I am a strong believer in each to their own as long as they are happy and in tune with their body. My family would eat meat quite a few times a week and I guess I didn’t have a great deal of choice. However as I grew and became more aware of my digestive system I realised meat (red in particular) really does not sit so well with my body.
Since meeting my partner just over two years ago we have cut meat almost entirely out of our diets. He was already an almost-vegetarian so it just made sense seeing as though we really like a vegetarian diet. We probably eat meat (fish or chicken or a small steak) once a week and that is it. I actually suggested to him yesterday about becoming a vegan for a week and he was super enthusiastic so that will happen very soon; I’m going to ask Naomi Rose at the gluttonous vegan to make me a menu!
Have you read ‘Animal Liberation’ by Peter Singer? I know you don’t need converting, but it is a pretty amazing book written in an age when not many people even knew what a vegetarian was (except for your Mum – what an awesome and enlightened lady)!
.-= Adele´s last blog ..A gift from Josie =-.
okay this is just so fascinating for me and so great that you mister work so well together in the kitchen. i definitely admire this split yet togetherness, it’s very interesting and very cool.
.-= katelin´s last blog ..Fondue is Fun (pt 2.) =-.
That’s pretty inspirational, and in a weird way, the essence of true love. The mere fact that you without complaining take each other’s foibles into account and alter your lives so that neither is made to feel guilty or like a burden is absolutely wonderful.
Thinking VERY simple, and having had a veggie ex-girlfriend, I think you’ve actually come across the best way really. If you make sure to have a bunch of ‘core’ items that you both like, you can fairly easily build on that to make a communal dish. You’ve gone very Western, I actually milked my Chinese background:
– Noodles/rice for a base (fried/steamed/boiled)
– Veggies that I will actually allow in lieu of meat (tell him to try frying mixed mushrooms in butter and he can always add some chopped bacon or something later. Very simple)
– Miscellaneous veggies that everyone loves. Roasted parsnips if you’ve for something vaguely roast-y, mangetout, spring onions (I put them in ANYTHING that will take them), onions
And stir frying is so very fast and you can put whatever you want in, or just steam the rice/boil the noodles and prepare the extra stuff you and your Mister desire individually however you like. Separate and subtitute the ‘main features’ if you like, but you still save a bit of time.
Wow. Got carried away there, and it’s probably stuff you already know, but there we are :)
.-= Stephen K´s last blog ..Maybe =-.
I love that you allow Mister the freedom to be who he is while he allows you to do the same. I hate to hear when one person makes the other person change the way they eat just because it doesn’t fit into their own personal plan.
This was such an interesting post. I’m inspired by the way you cook during the week – the Mr and I are so bad at this. We often run out of basics mid-week and have to make a horrible late night dash to the supermarket. Case in point – at this very moment we have no cereal or bread in!
I’ll definitely start browsing food blogs for inspiration, and I’m going to sit down before I go shopping and write a proper list. Thanks so much!
.-= Jen´s last blog ..Reduce, reuse, recycle =-.
I’m STILL contemplating giving up meat for Lent, and yes I’m fully aware it begins today (and as of right now I’m eating my hummus pita for lunch, just in case I launch into full on vegetarian for the next six weeks!), and it’s things like planning two sets of meals that ahead of time that throw me off – we only recently launched into making recipe meals instead of ready meals, and I’m only just getting used to THAT! I admire you guys and your planning and organizational skills :)
.-= Emily Jane´s last blog ..Glee karaoke, pulled muscles and the best 24-hour trip ever! =-.
i love that you operate a split kitchen. having bounced back and forth between mean/no mean diets i can appreciate the planning/organizing and cooking that goes into meals with a meat-eating companion. :)
That is such a nice post, especially the whole split-kitchen scenario. I’m glad you two really made it work and have made compromises with each other too.
I’m not a vegetarian, but I don’t eat much meat either. I will only eat mostly poultry and lean steak. Usually it’s just once a week, or even less. When I was younger, my mom used to cook chicken at least 3-4x a week, that when I went a few days without it, I could notice the difference. I was actually feeling more tired than usual, probably from lack of protein, etc.
My boyfriend is big on protein, whether there is meat or not. He is even a protein-shake drinker (2-3x a day). Even though he loves his meat, he knows the right kind of bread to get with the right kind of protein, and to get other food. And I’ve learned what to look for when grocery shopping on my own. Now I can go days without meat and feel just fine. :)
All I can say is that if I could eat soy, fruits and more veggies I’d likely cut way back on my meat consumption too. I rarely eat red meat, but turkey is my staple food. My allergies really dictate my life which is awful, but I don’t have much of a choice, sadly. Here’s hoping I grow out of them!
I think it’s wonderful that you and mister compromise and share the kitchen and meals together. My brother is a vegetarian and it’s really helped the family come up with meals that include protein that won’t kill me and won’t offend him. Kind of fun, really! I always get super excited when I have a new vegetarian recipe to try for him :)
.-= Nora´s last blog ..Free =-.
I always feel pretty guilty when I head home for a break because my mom is absolutely bewildered on how to cook for me. I remind her that I am just the same but a simpler version. In order to make her happy and feeling as though she cooked a great meal (which she always does) I simply purchase small alterations for myself and cook them myself so as not to be a hassle. Whole wheat pasta instead of regular, smaller portions, simple things that wont set me apart from the rest of the dinner table.
Thank you for this.
I’m a meat eater, but it’s nice to spend a moment in the mind of a vegetarian.
I’d like for my family to eat less meat. I actually never really ate much until I married my husband. I am going to try some of the dishes you mentioned. xx
I am not a vegetarian but I do eat vegetarian meals a lot. I don’t cook with meat very often, maybe once or twice a week (though I do like ham and chicken and turkey on my sandwiches so I do eat meat more often than that), and I just cook vegetarian the rest of the time. But really, I personally don’t even distinguish between meals that are vegetarian and meals that are not. They simply are meals I like. I find the mindset that a meal has to have meat very difficult to comprehend (and that’s a mindset that is pretty widely spread in my conservative home state – traditional Bavarian cooking simply involves a load of meat and carbs).
I probably owe this more open-minded approach to food to my parents. My brother has been a vegetarian since he was three (I am two years older than he is), so growing up, meat at home (except for lunch meat) was always a treat because my parents would stick with vegetarian meals (they didn’t want to or didn’t have time to cook separate meals). While I didn’t mind it all that much, my only wish for what we would eat for Christmas (my parents would ask us) was “something with meat.” When I moved out to live on my own, I first had to get used to handling raw meat because it kind of grossed me out. It’s still not one of my favorite activities but I don’t give it much thought anymore.
.-= Karen´s last blog ..Dessert inspirations =-.
Great post, lady :)
Do you mind emailing me the title of the cookbook that deals with texture issues?
Our kitchen struggles revolve around the fact that Shawn does not cook, at all, and has no interest in ever learning how to cook. He would quite happily eat a sandwich every night for dinner if it meant not having to learn how to cook. Which I can’t really fault him for – I would quite happily live in a mountain of filth if it meant not having to ever venture into the scary garbage room. We balance each out is what I’m saying.
.-= hillary´s last blog ..It Takes A Crane To Build A Crane It Takes Two Floors To Make a Storey =-.
My house is a dictatorship and I am its benevolent ruler. Therefore, when I cook (and lets face it, I do all the cooking), I cook vegan or vegetarian.
My husband eats meat occasionally, but if he wants to do it at home he needs to get acquainted with Senor Skillet and his friend Mr. Grill.
I bet he wishes I was as flexible as you, but then again, he doesn’t have any food allergies, and he’ll eat anything as long as he’s allowed to douse it in Tabasco.
.-= Miss Dallas´s last blog ..Baptised by Fluffy White Snow =-.
First of all, I think your blog is beautiful. I just recently started reading, but it’s so lovely and I find you just cute as a button.
There, now that that’s out of the way!
I grew up in a family that ate a lot of meat. And I married a man who thinks a meal isn’t a meal without it. I eat meat – chicken, beef, turkey, very little pork – but I’ve been thinking a lot about eating less meat and gravitating more towards a partially-vegetarian lifestyle. It sounds half-assed and lazy, but I think that much of a change would have to be a gradual one for me. And regardless, I’m always interested to hear how other people handle it, so I can possibly get new ideas. So thank you for posting on this!
.-= StaceyParadise´s last blog ..On going public, the Quarterlife Crisis, and losing my VLOG virginity =-.
Kyla, I love your blog! I was a vegetarian for a little over a year, but I missed meat. It was always interesting, the reactions from others. It seems to make people uncomfortable. Perhaps because they feel guilty or something, or differences in others make them question their own decisions. Regardless, I enjoyed reading your take, and also poking around the rest of your blog. I’ll definitely be back!
Emery
Can I just say this post was amazing. I’m dating a pescatarian and sometimes its tough because the only things I really know how to cook are carnivorous meals. But we try- for example she will have a stuffed mushroom and I will have lamb and we share the side dishes or something like that but I love the idea of the family vegetarian cookbook!
it makes me look forward to finding a middle ground with her and figuring out what meals we BOTH enjoy so that if we are tired we can use those meals as a go-to.
loved this. Thanks.
.-= Matt´s last blog ..Heartless =-.
I am not a vegetarian, but I have to constantly explain why I do not eat beef or pork and why I haven’t since I was a teenager. The only meat I would never give up is fish/shellfish, at least when I live by the ocean. I do not cook meat in my house… other than fish and shellfish. the smell of cooking meat repulses me now. But, if I fell in love with a man who liked meat, I would cook for him. As long as it is organic, farm raised, grass fed beef or something healthy and more ethical. :) I also was a vegan for awhile and learned all kinds of fun tricks that way. I think being less of a meat eater helps you cook more exciting things. :) Anyway, loved this post.
.-= Alex´s last blog ..pixie658: being very productive… catching up on olympics from last night. :) =-.
You = me.
I went vegetarian at age 3 after I learned in preschool that hamburgers were cows. Apparently, I found this disgusting. (Still do.)
No one else in my family is vegetarian, I married a meat-eater and no one seems to care for my flimsy “I just don’t like it” reasoning. Unlike you, however, I started eating chicken in college, lest I starve to death in the shitty cafeteria.
Regardless, I’m glad to know there are others like me. :-)
.-= elle michelle´s last blog ..It’s coming together =-.
I’ve definitely had more than one person ask if it’s ok if they eat meat in front of me! You’re right – who told these people they can’t?! I’ll admit – OCCASIONALLY I even cheat a little and try a little bite of something I once craved, especially if it’s prepared in an interesting way (Guess I’m a foodie first, and a vegetarian second, ha).
I love your split kitchen tips, and from someone dating a carnivore – I am starting to totally get (and appreciate!) learning to cook with a sense of adventure :)
.-= Doniree´s last blog ..The Pescatarian Lifestyle, Part Next =-.
I’m a pescetarian and reading your post made a lot of sense to me because it’s extremely similar to how Glenn and I eat together {he is still a carnivore} :) Thanks for sharing your tips!
.-= Liz´s last blog ..Music Monday: Autechre =-.
Thanks for sharing, that was a very interesting look into how your kitchen works. I’m so proud that you guys continue to try to cook two different kinds of foods in your kitchen, some people would have just given up!
Raw meat IS gross. I know how to roast a chicken now, but it’s still nasty.
.-= Margarita´s last blog ..This One’s For You. =-.
I have a whole three ring binder (okay…six) full of recipes, and I page through them every Friday night (my chill night at home) to find recipes for the next week. Since I’m only cooking for myself, I tend to look for things that I can keep at six servings and freeze (soup, man! it powers the world!) as well as creative ways to reuse leftovers (okay—there’s brown rice in the fridge; let’s see I also have two oranges; let’s reduce the fresh orange juice, add some frozen peas, maybe a few red pepper flakes). I love to try new things and challenge myself to find different and new combinations that work. I’m a scientist, so the whole try and error thing (plus following directions) comes very naturally to me. Cooking skills? No. I’ve made a whole ton of mistakes. But I’ve gotten better. I also have a few favorites that I make: pomegranate-kiwi salsa, Smitten Kitchen’s smashed chickpea salad, stir fries…and every day for lunch during the winter I eat frozen fruit + naked juice mixed together (the summer is fresh fruits all the way!)
I did try to be vegetarian in college, but my body just doesn’t jive with it, no matter how much spinach I ate or iron pills I took. So…I eat a few servings of meat a month to avoid anemia, and make sure that it is good delicious local meat (Hello Russo’s market and the farmer’s market).
And I do know the vegetarians you are talking about. They’re also the kind that typically subsist on french fries and white bread with peanut butter. And squeal whenever you eat meat. Ugh.
.-= Bridget´s last blog ..Happy Valentine’s Day! =-.
I eat mostly white meat, but I don’t ever just have a hankering for a big piece of meat. I find myself craving bread and cake much more ;-) I try to do a vegetarian meal once a week and have made some fantastic stuff and some WEIRD stuff, mostly out of the Moosewood Cookbook. It’s always very involved, though – so I’m excited to hear what your go-to vegetarian meals are. My husband, by the way, is never excited about vegetarian night, mostly because most of them have been huge disasters. Burritos made of tofu, beans and quinoa? FAIL!
.-= Taryn´s last blog ..Copy Cat. Meow. =-.
It’s so apt that you’re posting this (cue Twilight Zone music for our once again parallel lives!) because being a vegetarian again has sort of been brewing in my consciousness…not sure why, but you and our dear Doniree have both posted on this TODAY and hmmm…I may be picking your brain soon.
And…how about you post that pizza dough recipe? Pretty please? Thanks :)
I love this post. I stopped eating meat/poultry by the time I was 15 so at this point it’s ingrained, but have always found it difficult when dating meat eaters. Thanks for sharing your tips about making it work. Muchly appreciated.
Also isn’t it annoying when people try to convince you to convert you back to meat? I find it is.
.-= Meghan´s last blog ..Who Likes Free Stuff? =-.
This is so interesting. While there are a lot of meats that I don’t like, I do love chicken and ground beef (classy, I know). I hope that someday I can find a local organic farmer to buy from. I’ll have to do some research.
Anyway, one of my goals is to go vegetarian for a month, so I’ll definitely have to look into some of those cookbooks! Can you share the names of your favorites?
.-= Kathleen´s last blog ..So About That… =-.
what a great post today! My roommate is a vegetarian and I am not so I totally understand the split kitchen thing. When we first moved in together it seemed so daunting, but in actuality its not that difficult, since I eat anything, especially veggies!
.-= bodelou´s last blog ..it was a weekend… =-.
I’ve always wondered what it would have been like to grow up vegetarian! Almost every veg I know made the change as a teenager or adult.
I can’t believe people won’t accept that you don’t like meat. That’s just silly.
.-= Vanessa ´s last blog ..Quicken Cash Manager Giveaway Winner =-.
I’m not a vegetarian but my brother has been for about four years now. The silliest thing he’s experienced is that for family holidays, everyone always tries to overcompensate for him. They never realize that he’s essentially only restricted from the main dish, because all the side dishes (veggies and potatoes) are vegetarian anyway. Still, every holiday there are offers to make something extra – usually pasta – because otherwise, “what is he going to eat?”
In terms of cooking at home, I think at first my mom was thrown for a loop because she figured she’d have to make all new stuff for him, but it’s worked out. If we’re having a meat-centered dish, he’ll have the side dishes and make some tofu or Morning Star Farms stuff. We also already had a bunch of vegetarian recipes in rotation – cheese ravioli, stuffed shells, quiche – so he’s able to eat those too.
.-= Cait´s last blog ..good thing i’ve got all this chocolate. =-.
I don’t have anything against vegetarians. My only beef is that I wish I knew how to better cook for vegetarians.
.-= phampants´s last blog ..I Want to be an Olympian! =-.
Our situation is similar in that I’m a vegan & my man is a lax vegetarian (in that, if there isn’t a veggie option or the one option doesn’t fit into to budget, he’ll go with white meat or fish). Plus, he loves to cook where I only kinda like it & I love to bake where he only kinda likes it. So, since he doesn’t have a lot of qualms about what he eats he just caters to my diet. He’ll eat the pizza topped with lots of veggies & no cheese & make meals where he can add cheese or a little meat to his portion without worrying about what’s in mine. He just substitutes the kinds of things like butter or milk for vegan options. Fortunately we don’t have the same allergies to contend with that your mister does…except for my allergies which are dairy & seafood but that makes it all the easier to be a vegan.
I know what it’s like to be grilled about your reasons to be veg, too, & I would also like to know who these people are that scare all the omnivores out there into thinking we’re going to judge them or preach to them or whatever…
.-= Alexis´s last blog ..What Not To Say =-.
I am not a HUGE meat eater, but I have never considered going vegetarian.
My grandfather had a butcher shop (and slaughtered the animals himself), so I grew up with meat… and if animals are not abused and treated badly, I don’t mind eating meat. We’re carnivores after all.
However, I personally prefer vegetables and salads over most meat dishes, so naturally my meat intake is on the low side.
I think it’s ridiculous that people don’t accept it when you say that you “just don’t like meat”.
I know it’s not exactly comparable, but I am met with the same “confusion” when I tell people that I basically don’t drink. I just don’t like the taste of alcohol. If I say that, they get into a discussion with me about why and how that is possible and that it must be that I don’t drink for “moral reasons” more than for just not liking it.
What part of “I don’t like it” don’t they understand?
.-= san´s last blog ..Work it out weekends: healthy cooking =-.
I really enjoyed this post! I’m glad to know that it’s not rocket science to live with a split house. I often times want to go the vegetarian route but worry about my fiancee “Where’s the meat?” approach. Glad to know it can be done. Thank you!
.-= Kelly´s last blog ..2010 Austin Half Marathon Race Recap =-.
You know I am not vegetarian but I admire people who are. I just love me my little burger every now and then way too much. :) However, there are weeks when I don’t even realize that I haven’t cooked any meat for days. It happens, for example, when we have salads a few days in a row or I just eat some bread with a delicious cream cheese spread for dinner. The other day I made a lemon-orange based spaghetti sauce – also no meat.
But being from Germany, I have pretty much lived off of meat (My parents still slaughter their own pigs to this day… sorry I mentioned this.) I can tell you some interesting meat traditions from Germany… but they might be too gross. ;)
Oh my goodness, do not under any circumstances apologize for your family! I’m sure your family’s animals are very happy guys and that they live far longer and in much better care than they would if they were free out in the wild or on a factory farm. People who really care about their animals are hard to find, even among people who are raising animals as pets, it sounds like you should be totally proud of them- regardless of what I do or don’t eat ;)
– kr
.-= Stefanie´s last blog ..Things I am happy and excited about. =-.
I’m pescetarian (crab cakes are just about my only weakness). I been grossed out by meat since I was little, and now I just can’t get animal suffering out of my mind. For me, humanely raised meat doesn’t address all the issues and gosh, it’s pricey! I have no issues with people who eat meat either — seriously, to each her own. It’s such a personal choice.
My husband eats meat, but not much. And I do the cooking in our house, meaning he eats what I make. Because of that, most days the only meat he eats is a couple of deli slices. We eat a lot of Mexican (it’s just made for veg people), a little pasta sometimes, homemade pizza, big salads, stir fry, and lots of other things. The options are really endless! I’m with you on the complexity too; simple is best. What is your cookbook?
I’ll grab the cookbook’s title tonight for you & post it here!
-kr
.-= Ally´s last blog ..Making a Mess =-.
I am vegetarian and have been for several years. I know my “why” speech by heart and it is always a surprisingly large concern with the guys I date. My last boyf and I never cooked dinner together because of this. To me though, someone who eats meat is not a big deal to me. I don’t judge their lifestyle if they don’t judge mine. There are a lot of veg dishes that my non-veg friends/roommates like. One of them being vegetarian burritos. They usually can’t tell the difference. Pasta with veggies is also a common options.
It sort of blows my mind that people grill you about your choices or preferences. As a generally curious person I often wonder why people do the things they do, but I would never imagine trying to convince a vegeterian to eat meat or asking them about their politics. Its basically a non-issue for me. It usually encourages me to try something different — like tofu or gluten free cooking/baking.
This is a great post. I can’t believe people actually try to change their order for fear of offending you!!
I think I could become a vegetarian relatively easily. I rarely cook meat because it just feels complicated to me. Unfortunately, my alternative is often pasta so I’m afraid if I went completely vegetarian, I’d miss out on a lot of nutrients because I’m not informed enough to make the switch. Posts like this are good info. for those of us in the middle!
.-= A Super Girl´s last blog ..The evolution of cooking =-.
This was so informative! Thank you! Honey Bunches and I do the same thing on a different level. We sit down usually one day a week, and brainstorm recipes we’ll be buying for on our biweekly grocery shopping trip. We have a few staple meals, like you two do, and we always make sure our cabinets are stocked with the ingredients to make those when we are feeling uninspired. We pretty much have it down to a science now, and spend the exact same amount every trip. Even if we try new things! It’s fun :) I love that you put up your favorite recpies every so often now, too. We’ll be trying those soon!
I went on a juice diet for a week, it was actually pretty cool. Coming up with new mixes of fruits and veggies that tasted good…. but on the fifth day not chewing my food really got to me…. and I would have killed someone for hamburger.
I’ve tried not eating meat just to see if I could and the longest I went was 18 days…
I am amazed when I talk to people that don’t eat meat, and in a weird way I’m jealous. I just like eating it and don’t have the will power to give it up.
That’s so interesting to me! I think that what we eat is just like everything else- what’s right for one person is in no way right for other people, and if you don’t go veg properly you can get quite sick. You have to be totally on top of your protein sources and B vitamins, and maybe you just can’t get enough of what you need without meat? But I’ve heard about people having really terrible meat cravings when they try to go veg- I’m just glad that I stopped at chicken pieces and tuna, it wasn’t too hard to walk away from that ;)
-kr
.-= Woolly´s last blog ..The Bet =-.