There are some nights that, instead of anyone having to force it and instead of trying to see where the evening will go next, something just flows in and the evening is perfect. That was Saturday night.

The day was strange. The Bachelorette loomed at the end of the night and the whole day felt lopsided and weighted towards 7 pm forward. I was a little nervous, I was excited, my mom was calling about catering and cleaning, and I started to realize that I haven’t even had people get together for my birthday for a few years never mind something of this scale. Even though it was going to be a lower level of energy than most bachelorette parties, it was going to be a bit of a bigger deal for me than I had anticipated.

I went to my mom’s house where her friends and my friends got together – we drank wine, ate the amazing catering she had arranged for. My unbelievably cool grandma had an fabulous time, and completely un-prompted used identity sensitive pronouns when talking to one of my friends who is a boyish looking lesbian who is big in the local drag king scene. She called my friend He, because she thought that was the most sensitive thing to do. She hugged her at the end of the night. I was blown away. My friend nearly cried.

One of My Disco Bridesmaids

We went to 7-11 in a limo like we were at prom and then loaded into a private Korean karaoke bar that was wonderfully strange and where war themed music videos and a ballet rendition of Don Juan played over top of any song you sang. The 12 year old son of the owners showed us into the room, it was BYOB, but you had to clean up after you were finished with the room – they provided windex but you have to bring your own paper towels, which just made the whole experience even better! We turned the disco ball on, got the wine out and started belting.

Aladin, Spice Girls, Now and Then, and Backstreet Boys all got dusted off. It was totally ugly.

We drank home made Portugese moonshine, ate cupcakes, and killed ourselves laughing. In the end only the friends who are closest to me came. I was able to reconnect with two girls from high school who are incredibly dear to me, relax with some of my best friends, and just have a really casual and hilarious evening.

It was perfect. My sister (and Maid of Honour) spent a lot of time making sure that everything was taken care of, and in the end she became violently ill the day of the party. She was so sick that she only able to get out of bed for a few moments and couldn’t come out at all- but the amount of work she put into it meant that we could just enjoy the whole evening, even though she couldn’t be there.

Video hunted down and killed the radio star

We were out until 11:45 pm, and then we all hugged and went home – I woke up the next morning not even remotely hung over and just buzzing from all of the love of last night.

I’ve had a couple of “Wait a minute. I’m getting MARRIED next week” moments of pure adrenaline this weekend, but every time I have one I step back and realize that the wedding is nothing scary. It’s only our friends and family who are coming. This is going to be not just fine, but fun. It’s a small ceremony and then some amazing food, and good pictures. That’s all this is – and I’m so happy that’s all this is. I can’t imaging facing 100+ guests, I would be a wreck trying to deal with that kind of spectacle. I’m hoping that this week is just another normal week followed by a really amazing party.

Crowning in 7-11, care of Emily Jane

Aside from a few moments of clarity, it’s all still extremely surreal. But maybe that’s part of what a wedding is, and there is so little formality in our lives these days that any formality seems completely new. I know that we’re going to have a great party and then get on to normal life. Thursday our family gets here, and we have our rehearsal, Friday we have a night off and then Saturday we’re going to be married!

The major work we’ve been doing on the house is finishing this week – windows and painting will be finished with days to spare before the wedding, and our crazy neighbours have been scared quiet by our refusal to back down or change our plans. The dogs having settled in and are hitting their 6 month birthday on Tuesday, and then there’s the wedding.

Looking back over the past three months, I can’t believe I’ve been able to stay sane through all of this, and I’m officially ready for some calm. No more moving and no more major life events. Just some time to rest from a crazy and beautiful summer.