August 24th, 2010
These Days
I’m a hot yoga addict. Give me a quiet warm space to stretch and regroup! My new studio is my happy place and my introductory studio pass means I can go as much as I like for the first month! It’s not nearly as intense as I’d heard (which was my big concern) and I’m in love with having a little time that’s all for me & just being still.
I’m adapting. I recently found out that my job share is ending a year earlier than expected, and it’s been a big thing to wrap my head around. Jesse and I have been going through our budgets and writing figures in the margins of planners, formulating plans over spicy food, and making sure to laugh more than stress. When that’s not easy, we change topics – it’s not a race, and big changes aren’t a one conversation thing.
I’m daydreaming about other lives that might be mine. Maybe I could be as a shop girl in a perfect little boutique? Or I could work with little kids in a colourful space? What about a huge bright gallery where tip toes echo? Whatever I do next, I know one thing: it’s going to be in a positive and interactive place. I just need to find it.
I’m loving my tattoo. Introvert that I am, I became really camera shy after I got my tattoo and it took me a little while to get used to it (and to the way people stare at me now!). My confidence has come back with a vengeance this month and I’m so relieved! Also, I kind of want it made into a half sleeve, stat :)
I’m branching out and making time. I’m making a big effort to get to know crafty girls and small business owners in my city, and to make time for friendships to develop. I’m really excited to spend time with the fun and sweet local girls I keep meeting, and to make time for hanging out, martinis, and being silly together when the mood strikes.
I’m working hard to stay positive. When things get stressful I tend to draw into myself, but in spite of the job change and the stress that can bring, I’m trying to stay as positive as possible and keep grounded. I want to love the possibility this change brings, not focus on the in between. Some days it’s a big effort, and some days are more successful than others, but when I stay grounded in learning and enjoying what I have, I can’t help but notice that life is very good. I just hope the in between doesn’t last too long.
ps – Exciting news: Danielle at Sometimes Sweet (one of my favourites!!) is featuring me in Tattoo Tuesday – click here to check for my interview later today :)
I think your tattoo looks absolutely amazing. I have been daydreaming about getting a half sleeve myself!
Your tattoo looks amazingggggggggg. Beautiful.
If you would like to try being a shop girl, this might interest you.
I like the later point about new friends and martini’s! :-D
I work with kids and it’s a pretty great job (hard sometimes, yes) but mostly really refreshing. I’m sure you can knock all those ideas off your list (and more) in this lifetime,
:-D Jill
This picture makes your tattoo look so drool-worthy.. but well.. I wouldn’t DROOL on it necessarily. But it looks so pretty :)
I LOVE that picture of you. Your tattoo suits you so well, I’m glad you’re regaining your confidence now that you have it! Oh and I totally think you should half-sleeve it. It would look aaaaa-mazing. :)
Thank you for answering. I was really curious.
I saw on twitter you got a new job, congrats! I know we don’t really know each other but you seem like such a nice, genuine person, I really wish you all the best and was happy for you when I read you had found a new job.
Best,
Jen
This is such an awesome list Kyla! I want to start yoga, but hot yoga seems a little TOO intimidating! Plus I’m not good with a lot of heat… I get light headed. But that’s awesome that you’re enjoying it! And that you’re so positive about everything. I love it. You are going to do great things, I know it!
I am totally in love with your tattoo and it’s inspired me to really think about taking the plunge and getting something in a more visible spot. I’ve got five tattoos, but they’re all covered up. I wish I had something a bit more out there.
Your attitude is so inspiring!! And I think that’s the right way to think about it….all the possibilities out there. Here’s a chance to dream and think about the perfect place for you. This is such a great reminder to try and stay positive – I need that!!
(and me too…LOVE hot yoga :)
I’m so terrified of hot yoga, and so in awe that you’re doing it! I love your “staying positive” bit – apropos after the stupid comment about your tattoo from Dani’s blog. As I tell my teenage girl clients on a daily basis: someone is always going to be mean to you in your life, so it’s your job to keep your chin up because you’ll never be able to make mean girls stop being mean. :)
I’m glad you’re enjoying hot yoga. I still haven’t tried it yet even though I just discovered a new yoga studio nearby. Daydreaming is a lot of fun especially if you try to make it happen! Good luck! :)
1. Mazel tov on the new gig! What a relief to have found something – especially something you’re excited about!
2. Love the tattoo, which we’ve already covered.
3. Please keep reminding US to stay positive! I need it, too, & you’re a good source for it.
<3
there isnt enough time in the day! but I am living up to my four simple goals as well. so far, i am doing really well on two of them. 50% isnt too bad!
No kidding! As long as you’re having fun with your goals when you’re working on them, that’s all that matters. :)
Your tattoo is absolutely breathtaking, Kyla. I think it fits your beautiful personality!
Oh my goodness, I’m right there with you on the “working hard to stay positive.” I’ve felt so bitter lately, and I absolutely hate it. I’m trying to look forward at the positive things and find all of the happy things in each of my days.
With my schedule now, I really feel like I have no time for anything I’d like to start doing (sewing, yoga, running) because I’m so tired when I get home that I just want to sit and stare at a wall. I’m hoping I can balance everything out in the near future.
Sometimes just knowing that balance is coming is enough- my August has been crazy. My work schedule has changed week to week, I’ve had no time to design, and then I found out I was going to be job searching! lol It’s enough to make a person crazy!
I’m so looking forward to September – I’m doing a lot, but having a more normal schedule will be so good for my heart.
Hold in there!! <3
i loved this post a lot. :) and i love your tattoo – i was so stoked to see you on danielle’s blog today!
Thanks so much Kelly Ann, I was beside myself to be featured over there :)
Hello!
I was happy to see your post on tattoo tuesday, it’s always exciting to see crafty/inspiring ladies from Canada! I am a fellow crafter from Victoria, BC and it made me smile to read about your adoration for cherry blossoms in Vancouver! I moved from Manitoba two years ago and am super excited each year that the trees bloom and then when the pretty petals fall to the groud and the streets are covered in pink. It’s truely beautiful.
Anyhow, I look forward to following your blog!
-Alysha Elizabeth.
If you are interested, you can find my blog here: http://prettylittleragsnbones.blogspot.com/
Your tattoo is GORGEOUS!! So vibrant. You know, I never wanted a tattoo that could be seen but ever since you got this one I’ve been leaning towards one that I can actually show off. You’ve inspired me! :)
Thanks so much! I love how colourful it is too, I’m so glad I dove in :)
I seriously cannot get over how awesome! your tattoo is. It’s making me itch for a bigger piece of ink, posthaste.
These days I’m: insanely busy at work; just got to see my sister return safely home from over a year in Korea; spent an entire weekend poolside and lakeside and dancing with aunts and uncles and cousins; getting psyched for a trip to Hawaii next! weekend. These days I’m really happy.
Hawaii is NEXT WEEKEND?? How did that happen so quickly? Have an amazing time! :)
You are such a beautiful person, Kyla. All these things are wonderful, especially the “working hard to stay positive.” With all the moving & chaos, sometimes it’s hard for me to see the forest for the trees. I’m trying to step back & look at the positive other than dwell on the negative. It’s hard, but totally makes a difference. Thanks for being such an inspiration, you’re my hero. <3
You’re such a sweetheart, thank you! It’s definitely a battle, I think my natural tendency is to be a bit of an Eeyore when things get rough, but I really – really – want to change that. Inch by inch, right? :)
Your tattoo looks AMAZING. It’s so vibrant…I love it! And I totally get you about adapting…soooo there right now :)
AND your final point staying positive…gosh I can so relate. It’s funny – your thinking can and does effect your mood/outlook. Hard as it is to remain positive I can honestly say the times I make a conscious effort to remain positive and have faith are the times when things are just that much brighter.
It makes such a big difference! Last year I was in the same situation, job searching & not sure of my direction, and it was such an awful experience! lol This year I’ve simplified my resume and my life, I’m just focusing on being positive, and I found a great match in no time. My training is already scheduled :)
A lot of it’s luck and timing but if you can enjoy it, it makes such a difference.
Oh! How I miss Bikram yoga. It seems to me that it’d be the prefect prenatal workout … and yet, that hot room … well, it’s apparently a little too hot for us big-bellied ladies. Sigh. Enjoy it for me, would ya?!
I will! Maybe a normal prenatal yoga class would tide you over? :)
I’ve been mulling over hot yoga for weeks. You have given me the courage to at least TRY it. But what may not be that tough for you will probably kick my butt!
The nice thing is that there are always a huge range of skill levels and body types in all of the classes – and yoga isn’t a competitive sport. The teachers in my classes have been really good with providing commentary about how you approach the poses should be about what’s comfortable, not what’s impressive to other people. I don’t over do it and have a lot of fun :)
The tattoo looks great! So colorful and gorgeous. What would you add on And I’m glad to hear Bikram isn’t as intense, I’ve heard scary stuff about it.
I’m still too much of a wimp for Bikram! I’m doing Moksha, but I think that the intro level classes for all kinds are pretty forgiving :)
Hi Kyla! I just found your blog and I think its really great. I’m enjoying reading
your past posts. love the tattoo too. I will be back. :)
Thanks so much for finding me!: )
what a beautiful tattoo!! love cherry blossoms! found you via sometimes sweet…i say go for the half sleeve..you live once, right! have fun now…i love my tattoos and so happy with them…people always say well what happens when you get older…well i’ll be old and i can say i had fun when i was young and loving life!
xo,
cb
lol I love that argument, when I’m older I’ll still be me!! I’m really lucky to have grown up in theatre around all different kids of people, including some really strong and beautiful older women who are every bit as out there as they were in their 20s :)
Glad you are doing so well! Our tattoos are so similar, and I also felt pretty self conscious at first. But then again… I also wanted to show it off. I used to think people were judging me when they stared at my tattoo, but then I came to realize they were just admiring it. :) I can’t wait to see it turned into a sleeve! I’m planning my next tattoo, but on the opposite arm. Just saving my pennies right now. :)
I love that you think our tattoos are similar – I feel like mine’s a lot more ‘traditional’ than yours, yours is so detailed and refined it’s just like lace!
Your next tattoo, if it’s the one you posted about, is going to be gorgeous! I can’t wait to see it finished!
I love your photo. I’m not a tattoo person, but yours looks beautiful on you. What is a half sleeve? I guess I’m just curious :)
Thanks Jen! A half sleeve means that I’m looking to have the art extend down from my shoulder to my elbow. Right now it reaches about half way down my arm, but I want it to be just a little larger :)
Hot yoga is the besssssst. I haven’t been in so long but I remember being completely drenched in sweat and exhausted but feeling so refreshed at the same time. (As if that makes any sense, ha.)
And your tattoo is beautiful. I think you wear it well. :)
I love that feeling of being energized! I find that when I run I finish up feeling like I’ve been hit by a truck, but with yoga the lower impact really makes a big difference lol
I feel like I’m right where you are. Things are changing and instead of getting stressed out by them or letting them get to me, I’m staying in the now and really working at being positive. Good luck! You totally need to make it into a half sleeve. I’m getting used to mine and I think I’m going to really love it.
lol I can’t wait for it to be a little bigger! Yours is really beautiful :)
Good luck with staying positive!
They are a little addictive, I will admit. I have 6! Yours is beautiful too, I love it!
I so need to get back into yoga, I used to rock it out & it has been WAY too long. I love your tattoo & would love to see it as a half-sleeve as well! Makes me want to finish mine up more & more…& get my chest piece done…oy…
It’s tough to stay positive lately, we need a support group! ;)
Chest piece? Ooh! Cool cool cool!
I’ve been finding that yoga has been extremely helpful in dealing with my anxiety, I really love having that quiet place to just feel my body instead of living in my head :)
Also? I GET TO MEET YOU SO SOON! *dances*
My safe place right now is anywhere I can throw on my running shoes, headphones and just go. I forget how grounded I feel when I’m exercising five or six times a week.
I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again: I love you and Jesse as a couple (not like you need my approval) but everything you write about him comes from such a sweet, great place. I love it.
lol You are so cute! I love how fond you are of us as a couple! :)
I can’t wait for you to meet him someday soon <3
I daydream about other people’s lives being my own also….wouldn’t it be cool to be doing XYZ?! It drives me nuts when I think if I could make that a reality and haha, nope, I can’t.
lol I bet you could make something else for yourself if you really feel in love with it. I love escaping into those fantasies and coming back to my life to look around and go “Yea, actually? This is pretty awesome too!” :)
I just wish I have more time.
I definitely know that feeling, this year has just been screaming by!
I am so in love with your tattoo, and you know I’m not big on tattoos. It suits you perfectly so I’m happy you’re starting to have more confidence about it. <3
Thank you so much Stephany, that means a lot to me! <3
Just keep positive, everything happens for a reason. I’m glad you like hot yoga, it’s my favourite as well but there’s no studio in my immediate area :( I suppose I could just jump on a bus… lol.
I should also mention that I’m very guilty of staring at peoples tattoos. Horrible isn’t it? If the person notices I”ll say something, but I usually I just stare at it, look at the design, the colours, I’m sure if I saw your shoulder right now I would be admiring it too!
I don’t think it’s horrible to look at people’s tattoos at all – I’m just not used to it yet so at first I was like “WOAH! Too much attention!!” lol I’m getting used to it now though, and I don’t feel like I must have a stain on my shirt, or that my hair must be funny for people to be looking at me like that anymore ;)
Sometimes, when I feel my energy and inspiration is lacking, I love to come here and find some positive thoughts. Thank you, Kyla.
Oh that’s the sweetest! I’m glad this is a happy place for you – it is for me too :)
So, how about we remove Alberta and Saskatchewan fro the mix and squish ourselves closer together and be hot yoga buddies? Sound like a plan!?
Also, things have been a bit stressful here too with money, Eric is going back to school full-time and applying like crazy for sponsorships and scholarships. Until we know for sure that he’s getting that, I feel like I need to pinch every penny I have! I hope things work out for both our little families asap :)
Yes! I’ll pack a bag and meet you in six hours! Should we synchronize watches for good measure? :)
It’s hard to have one person in school and one person working- we did that when I was doing my BA, but it’s definitely doable. You guys will rock this, I’m sure of it! I’m keeping my fingers crossed on sponsorships & scholarships for you two!
These days….I am finding relief in friendships, much-needed laughter in my marriage, and confidence in myself. Hot yoga sounds rather pleasant, although it’s currently 104 degrees here, so I might as well go do some vinyasa flow outside ;)
lol I would definitely put a hold on the flow for now if it’s that hot! We just turned towards fall weather, so it’s the perfect contrast right now :)
I love the way you phrase everything – relief in friendships and your marriage? It sounds beautiful and perfect :)
Kyla, I love your tattoo. Its absolutely beautiful. Did you design it yourself?
Thanks Amanda – I wish! I brought in a lot of reference photos of old fashioned illustration from turn of the century Cherry Blossom Festival posters, baroque frames, and textbook illustrations, and this is what my artist dreamed up :)
I am loving the tattoo!! You look absolutely stunning. I am falling love with yoga right now as well…I’ve been going daily for the past week! Already I am noticing a huge change in my attitude and spirit. :) Hope all is well with you Ms. Kyla! <3
I’m finding that yoga is helping me to be more positive, I love being active and that it’s so low impact! I sound like I’m 80, but it really makes a big difference for my back! lol
I think your attitude is great! Being positive is the best way to get through stressful times and new/unknown changes!
It certainly helps if you can keep it up! And in my experience, going to matinees helps when it’s hard. I saw How To Train Your Dragon last weekend? Cutest thing in the world! :)
I’m glad to hear everything’s going so well! I love your tattoo! & the hot yoga sounds so fun! I’m grabbing your new button for my blog. =)
Thanks so much CaL – I can’t get over little Ash and his glasses, it makes me smile every time I see it lol
This is a lovely post, filled with wonderful thoughts. Thank you for sharing! And for showing off that stunningly beautiful tattoo (I love the flowers, so feminine and nature-bound).
I, too, tend to go into myself when stressed. I don’t see it as a negative, though. I find when I get passed the issue(s), I’m more able to be present to those around me. Staying positive, though, is so important. Even when I don’t see the good in a day, I put effort into emitting positivity.
Thanks so much for the sweet words! I really love how feminine it is too – I can’t wait for it to be a little bigger lol I’m so lucky that Jesse is on board! :)
Finding a way to process stress that works for you is so vital! For me, if I try to go it alone my anxiety gets out of control and I’m less able to deal with things. But I know exactly what you mean about being able to see everything clearly when you’ve moved past it a little more :)
I love that part about adapting – how big changes aren’t a one-off conversation and how remembering to laugh is the most important thing. I adore that, what a great reminder of a really simple truth :)
I find that when I try to solve it all in one go is when it feels the most overwhelming! We’ve been here before and we’ll be here again – there’s enough time to go see a matinee instead of worrying for a couple of hours :)
Honestly, August has been a rough month for me. Between things going on at work that frustrate me, finding out the value of my condo (which makes me sick to my stomach), and the whole E. situation, I am run down. I am fighting the urge to just collapse into myself and shut everyone out because I know that is not healthy… So I am struggling to look for the sunlight right now… But I know it’s out there, I just need these clouds in my life to move out so I can let the sun back in.
I will consider cloud clearing my official duty this weekend!
It’s hard to not feel let down and frustrated sometimes, and I find that when I’m actively trying to pull myself out of it, it can be really exhausting. But I just try to be kind to myself if nothing else- I recommend bubble baths and podcasts, movies and making good food :)
I love the positivity in this post, despite uncertainty. It’s so inspiring! And I absolutely adore your tattoo :)
I hope that you find the awesome job you’re looking for!
Thanks so much! I have some amazing leads *fingers crossed*
And the positivity is easy to write about, hard to practice, but I’m working on it! :)
Your tattoo is so gorgeous and it suits you so well. Every time I see a picture of you now, it just seems like it BELONGS there. So perfect; I’m glad you love it.
Oh wow Leanne, thanks so much! That’s very much how I feel, like it’s a very good fit for me :)
Erik and I are going through the same thing! I don’t have a job and he doesn’t really like his and we’re sort of fed up with NYC. We went to New Hampshire two weekends ago and as we drove home, through NH and then through Massachusetts, we thought, we should live here. Do what? No idea. But the idea of moving somewhere new and wonderful and calm and beautiful was enough to make us pull out our iPhones and look at Craigslist listings! Ha!
Oh wow! What an adventure Allison! That’s amazing! I’m rooting for you – even if you guys are just staying open to the possibilities. I love feeling like a whole other life, and all kinds of possibilities might be right around the corner. I hope I always have that in me, even in my 70s :)
I really love your tatt, and hopefully I’ll actually get with my artist to finish my back and start my sleeve!
Also, I have an introductory pass to a nearby Bikram studio, but I AM SO SCARED TO GO. I don’t know why, either. I’m familiar with lots of styles of yoga, but for some reason, hot yoga scares the mess outta me. I guess I just need to do a gut check and get over it!
If you’re scared, Moksha is the kind that I’m doing and its really gentle :)
I think that any of the beginner classes you can take are geared at being extremely inviting and non-intimidating- and the rooms are nice and warm (and you’ll sweat in them because it’s warm and you’re working hard) but it’s not sauna hot. You’ll do great!
I love these posts of yours and the way you always put things into perspective so simply and sweetly. You’re such an inspiration! :)
Thanks! I definitely don’t always succeed in staying in that mind set, but it’s always what I’m aiming for. They don’t give out awards for “Least Able To Roll With The Punches” after all, so I’m pulling myself out of contention ;)
I just tried yoga for the first time (well, actually the second- the first time involved a male instructor with super short shorts– i was scarred for life). I’ve been doing it on demand from my TV bc it’s free and I want to find an actual yoga buddy to attend real classes with and I haven’t figured that out yet. But hot yoga….it sounds scary! Still, I’m intrigued.
The biggest thing that I found is that hot yoga isn’t that hot! It’s more like… cozy yoga! lol I’ve been doing yoga from a DVD for a little while and I actually really like being in a studio – you can watch the people around you to make sure you know what’s going on, and the teacher can help you out if you’re on the wrong track.
The first time I went in and signed up for a class, I just said “Ok! So I have NO IDEA where anything is or what I’m doing. Help?” And they laughed and then walked me through the whole thing. It’s totally approachable :)
I’m loving your tattoo as well -it really suits you :)
Thanks so much Sarah! I feel like it was always there :)
I LOVE the self-portrait! You’re simply radiant and your positivity is shining! I’ve actually made it a September goal to go back to yoga after VEDA is over. (Making a vlog every day is quite time consuming when you’re not really a pro, like me!) I might consider trying hot yoga, now that you’ve mentioned it! Hope you find your place soon, Kyla. Any workplace would be lucky to have your bright smile there. ;)
You’re rocking VEDA! I’m giving up lol In early September I’m going to do a short where I cover all the topics in one go, but in a fun way, I can see it in my head already… :)
Hot yoga is my total safe place right now. Having never really done yoga before, I’m amazed at how much I absolutely love it!
It’s kind of wild, isn’t it? It’s heavenly! I’d heard so much about how crazy and intense it is, but I think that might be the Bikram people lol I’m doing Moksha, and it’s really gentle :)
These days I feel like I’m hanging on by a thread. The stress over the job situation and the possible “in between” is overwhelming sometimes. I am trying to stay positive and take a step back realizing how great life really is. I know that something awesome is just over the horizon but lately it feels like the horizon is getting further and further away. As Ray said, thanks for the reminder to stay positive and embrace change.
When the change you want is that far away it can be so frustrating! But you’re amazing Mandy, and I know that not only will things change for you soon – but that when they do, it will be incredible. And this weekend will help :)
Your positive attitude is inspiring. My job is ending earlier than expected, too, and it’s hard to look on the bright side. Thank you for reminding me to keep my chin up, I could turn this this into something great!
I’ve been finding that staying active is really helping me, hot yoga is a fantastic stress buster :) Good luck on finding a new job & keeping your chin up!