Leading up to the holidays everyone always seems to be at least two to three hundred times busier than usual, and as the icicles grow I’ve been thinking about how I’m spending my time and energy this month.

We all have the same number of hours in the day, but where we put them and what we get back from that can be wildly different.

Or at least it feels that way when we spend too much time reading holiday magazines!

In the sprit of getting through the holidays in one piece, I’m  sharing ideas on where you could splurge or save this year in the interests of a happier, less stressful holiday season. These are the ideas that I’m putting into practice, and I have a feeling it’s going to have a huge impact on how I feel this month, and how much I enjoy the holidays. At the very least, it’s going to be a fun experiment!

image: a sensible habit

The Splurge List!

Things to put time and energy into this December, in the interest of happier holidays.

01. Add your holiday dates into your email signature, stat.

With instant access to email, for most of us taking “real” vacations where we’re completely off the clock is tough. So far, managing expectations through clear communication and lots of advance notice is the best way I’ve found to keep everyone happy while actively protecting the time that I’m going to take off.

To do that proactively, last week I added a quick note that read “Happy holidays! Please note I’ll be away from email between December XY – January YX” and I know that even that small action will help make sure I really take that time away.

02. Get a haircut early in the month.

It’s nice to have a freshened up haircut for holiday photos, but it’s hard to have a sense of humour when you get a wonky cut right before a slew of family photos are taken. Ladies who’ve had their bangs butchered, amiright?

Get a trim in the next 10 days and you’ll either have another thing checked off your list, or enough time to find someone who can save you from a cut that’s asymmetrical… in all the wrong ways.

03. Savour that holiday feeling.

Finding personal ways to savour the holidays is the most reliable I’ve found to get into the Christmas spirit – and it seems to slow down this time of year so it doesn’t fly by at such a whirlwind pace! Pinterest is brimming with handmade decor projects you can browse over coffee, and even a couple sessions of doing something crafty or handmade can make you feel accomplished and relaxed.

My favourite ways to savour: stove top holiday scents, adding a few shakes of cinnamon to my coffee grounds for a “seasonal” pot of coffee in the mornings, the 1950’s & 60’s yuletide swing mix on Songza, and working on my new years resolution planning for next year so I can come into the holidays a big goal setting project already wrapped up.

04. Spend heaps of time with “home for the holiday” friends.

It could be grabbing brunch or sipping hot chocolate while watching the fireplace channel, any time I make for friends who are home this time of year is always memorable and well spent.

The Save List!

Things to minimize or skip this month as the holidays get crazy

01. Doing it all.

We all know that no one can really do it all, but it’s hard not to feel like we have to “perform” to make other people happy at this time of year. But it doesn’t have to be that way! You can stop your “doing it all” instincts from taking over your life by blocking out free evenings or weekend days in your calendar in advance, making a list of what you want to get done for the holidays (including estimates of how long that would take) and booking the time in, and by saying “I would love to! Let me get back to you once I’ve checked my holiday plans.” instead of committing to every fun event that comes your way. After all, unless you’re well rested and de-stressed, you won’t enjoy what you commit to!

02. New outfits for the holidays.

Oh, holiday parties! It’s tempting to make an already expensive season more stressful by trying to find something perfect for the events on your calendar. Instead of adding another thing to your to do list, you can take a basic dress or two and use accessories to restyle them. You’ll not only look gorgeous, but you’ll have saved time and money with just a little effort. And then you can take those styles forward to give your wardrobe new life beyond the holidays!

03. People who make your health / time / life choices about them.

This time of year can make sticking to your healthy eating and work out routine a battle as it is. But then there are those special people who are curious about why you’re not drinking, why you’re not taking a certain kind of dish, and are overly invested in your answers. It can make people who have severe allergies or strict food guidelines really uncomfortable! As a life long vegetarian, I’ve been there! It’s hard to navigate those conversations, especially when someone “hears” your answer as judgement of their choices.

I’ve found that focusing your praise in on something that you can eat helps to make the host feel appreciated, but if another guest wants detailed information about your choices and the conversation gets uncomfortable it’s perfectly acceptable to:

• Stop the conversation before it starts. Claim that you’ve just finished a huge plate of food! No one needs to know what you’ve been eating, and there will not be a polygraph.

Script: “I’m already stuffed! Everyone is crazy about the _________ – have you grabbed one?”

• Change the subject. People are usually more interested in speaking about themselves, so get them back to their favourite topic!

Script:“Wait a minute we’re getting stuck in a food rabbit hole, how is _________ going with you?”

• Be assertive about your boundaries in a sarcastic way if someone won’t stop pestering you for details.

Script: “As thrilling as this is, if we keep this up soon we’ll be doing live projections and analysis of each other’s blood samples. I don’t think this is that kind of a party!”

• End the conversation in a playful way. You don’t have to participate in every conversation you’re invited to, nor do you have to stay, and you don’t have to be aggressive to leave.

Script: “Actually, I’m old fashioned – the two things I never talk about at parties are my health and my vast wealth. Oh- I haven’t said hello to ________, great to see you!”

04. The usual schedule & the overwhelm that can come with it.

Sometimes it feels important to keep doing everything that you normally do – from meal planning or cleaning to working out or your work hours. But when things get stressful, it’s often not practical to stick with how you’ve done things before. Instead, if you have an idea of the minimum amount you need to do to keep the wheels rolling, that can be a fabulous and freeing place to start. It gives you more time to get the “musts” on your list finished, and recognizes that your top priorities are different at the holidays.

How are you keeping your holidays fun, calm and enjoyable this year? Where are you going to splurge your time & energy, and what are you going to skip?