January 21st, 2009
Maybe The Term “Life Hacking” Is Too Generous.
Sometimes it’s the little things. Knowing that my best friend is losing sleep over her recent unemployment, while I want to help so badly it hurts. Having a “talk” with my Dad when he asks if I can come to Phoenix next month, it’s having to remind him that Mister only has 5 days of holidays a year. That I’ll try for next year, but I’m not sure if it will have changed.
Sometimes it’s the not having privacy at work, or the debates between co-workers, or the over hearing discussions about raising teenagers. It’s the way Mister reacts when his friend has had a baby, like it’s about him & his feelings about children instead of her. It’s relentlessly packing a lunch, or it’s family and a lack of time at home. The suggestion that I shouldn’t really have dogs because I have too much traveling to do when I haven’t traveled in a few years, or about how my head spins when I try to figure out how much it must cost to do The Things That Twenty Somethings Do.
And then sometimes, all the tiny pieces of effort I’ve been making finally register with the universe, and little things come together.
I’ve been coming home and doing the things I need to do first. Clean. Make a lunch. Take a shower – then relax for the whole rest of the night so I can actually enjoy weeknights instead of running around trying to take on the world half a task at a time. All of the sudden I don’t feel rushed & I can sleep better.
Instead of pinning the puppies when they’re losing their sweet puppy minds to excitement, which seems to me like the dog version of going from slight disagreement to shouting in one move, I just loosely hold their collars and sit with them. I am a calm and immovable object. I ask them to sit. I am still. And I am the Zen Master of mysteriously calm and responsive puppies.
It’s getting past being shell shocked when I think about three of my five oldest friends moving away next year. I’m transitioning into being excited that they’re all moving to the Greater Toronto Area because I’ve never been to Toronto and that couldn’t really be more convenient if I asked for it to be.
It’s seriously looking at getting a part time job and going to a 50 hour work week so we can take a real holiday every year without worrying or compromising, or pay off our car twice as fast. I’m scared of how much this might complicate my life, but the worst I can do is fail right?
And most importantly of all, it’s taking down the baby gates in the house. Yesterday the puppies had full range of the house for the first time and they didn’t wreck anything.
You let the groomer clip your nails this week.
You hung with our in-laws and stayed calm 90% of the time.
You didn’t eat our garbage when we were at work.
Mal? Ash?
We’re buying the fancy rawhide tomorrow.
I worked a second part time job over the Halloween season and it was great. 2 months of a couple nights a week and saturdays to have a little extra moolah in my pocket was glorius. :)
I’m in a similar pinch, so it’s good to know of someone who’s fighting the same battles and planning on winning.
My life has felt chaotic lately as well. I blame it on the winter gloom. :)
When you come visit your friends in the GTA? Let me know so I invite you out to hang with me too! Ignore everyone else and their ideas that you should/shouldn’t travel or own dogs or whatever. You’re awesome as you are and I love that you do your think your way.
The GTA is a great place to live… I’ve did it for 26 years!
I know what a great feeling it is to be able to let the dogs free in the house and not have to worry about them destroying everything… it’s a beautiful thing.
Thanks for this post. You are great at capturing elusive emotions.
When I was in my 20s people were always telling me I should travel – and then I did and I was miserable (depressed, alone, it was just a bad situation). All I really wanted throughout my 20s was the get a dog. I’m not even kidding about that – I just wanted a dog. But I felt like all the pieces had to be in place to get that dog and here I am, age 33 and NO DOG. Okay, now it is a conscious decision because I have Moira and she comes first and the dog has to wait (but the day WILL COME). But really – if I had gotten a dog when I wanted to I would have had a wonderful decade with that dog. So I guess what I am saying is do what you want and I am jealous that you have two dogs.
mind tricking hyper puppies. i like it!
Big step with the removal of the baby gates. I’m still trying to get my puppy to go to the bathroom in the right spot.
Can I ask you how you did that? my lab is almost 4 years old and she’s still terrible. I’ll sign her for yoga lessons with me. Maybe we can meditate together without her licking my face as if it was a popsicle.
All of those negatives are not cool at all. Sometimes people complain about things in their life that really aren’t that important and don’t deserve the time they give it worrying. But yours are real concerns. Things that do make you stay up late at night thinking about it instead of sleeping. I’m glad you can look on the bright side of things. It’s all you can do sometimes.
I hope you’re finding that things are landing in place in just the proper way. And if not, it sounds like you have a good method of dodging the obstacles.
Thank you. You eloquently put into words the exact things that I’ve been feeling. Stressed; like there aren’t enough hours in the day, or enough money in the bank account.
& you also summed it up nicely. Doing the things that need to be done, so you can relax and worry less. Thank you for bringing this topic up, because it’s something that I need to take more seriously.
oohhh good pups!
really like this post, zen sister.
I too can easily fall in to the chaos that consumes being a younger person making my way in the world and starting my career, having a home life, etc. etc. etc.
I appreciate your candid storytelling, it’s comforting to read and easy to relate to.
Go Go Doggie Zen Master!
You are wonderful, and it sounds like your pups are too! I remember so well the first days of letting Adley have free roam with some confidence.
Things all come together one way or another, so hang in there with some delicious tea.
We are on the same wavelength today :)
This part of your post….
“I’ve been coming home and doing the things I need to do first. Clean. Make a lunch. Take a shower – then relax for the whole rest of the night so I can actually enjoy weeknights instead of running around trying to take on the world half a task at a time. All of the sudden I don’t feel rushed & I can sleep better.”
…spoke directly to me because I’ve been feeling the same sense of chaos lately and am desperate need of a slower pace of life.
Congrats to your puppies for being able to run free in the house without the baby gates. My puppies are fully trained but I still don’t trust them with all the white carpets, so ours have yet to come down.
Kyla, I am so proud of the puppies! No garbage? What an accomplishment!
I think if you get a part time job you should make sure to get one that you LOVE! I babysit at least once or twice a week (15 hours) and I absolutely love it. It’s fun money. It’s fun to make and fun to spend! Who knows, maybe it will help destress your life.
You and I are on the same page, here. You are much better at articulating it than me, though. I loved this post.
I love what you said about getting things done right when you get home as opposed to pushing it until later. I am so bad about that, I do it maybe once or twice a week but I need to every day.
Isn’t it great when puppies finally *get it* and behave exactly the way you want them to?!
I’m currently on my first pup, and I’ve had her for just a year, and its nice seeing her understand me more. Or maybe I’m just learning dog speak. :)
– Cesia.
This was hilarious! You’ve got some lucky puppies! ;)
A very good friend of mine lives in Toronto. I’m quite fond of it up there.
You’ve had a lot going on miss! It’s so easy to just surrender to the go-go-go and find yourself stressed out and bewildered as to how you got there. It happens to me quite often.
You seem to have gathered yourself together and found a system that works to make sure you get refreshed, and that is awesome.
I just hope that the potential part-time job has the easing benefits of the added financial security without stressing you out too much with the extra workload. Be careful, darling, we don’t want you to burn out.
Gosh, you do express yourself well. I actually feel calmer after reading this post. I’ve been trying to remind myself to just slow down too and I get a happy little high when I take the time to accomplish something like making my bed in the morning.
so very lovely. taking a moment to bring yourself back to center is hard, and you do it so well!
Being a 20 something can certainly take a lot of a gal, can’t it?
I find myself in the same boat sometimes and doing exactly what you are doing… teaching myself to relax again… really helps!
And how exciting about the dogs?
Oh, and I can totally relate about the friends moving away. My best friends don’t live near me anymore. It can be hard BUT it means I travel to see them, which is quite exciting.
*inspirational. I can spell, just not before I’ve had my coffee…
i’ve kind of been feeling the same way lately, like life is just getting away from me a little. i love that you’re able to slow yourself down a little and i love how calm you said you were with the puppies, my dogs are super high strung like that too and it’s so hard to just be calm so they are calm. be careful taking on an extra job, don’t get burnt out!! xo
As always, this is inspiriational and I feel like you plucked right into my own thoughts. I’m trying to help a friend (two, actually) desperately seek jobs. I’m starting hobbies and making lists and getting overwhelmed by the sheer inability to accomplish everything. Your Zen Master quote will stick with me. I don’t have puppies to restrain, but I do have a life to get a grip on.
*hug* You know, if it’s any help, in blogland you are the most put together, organized, lovely friend with well behaved dogs and if I ever needed advice I would consider you a surely reputable source. xo
I’m glad the puppies are being so good. You’ve got such a great perspective on life and I love this post.
Ha! We did write the same blog today!! That’s why I love you, dearie.
You’ve definitely creatively summed up parts of most people’s lives so well. Loved this post!
Your writing seems to be a perfect unveiling of your thoughts. A pleasure to read. Thank you.
your blog is too cute. love the layout and your writing style is very intriguing. and the wedding pictures of you guys below are absolutely gorgeous!!! congrats (even though it’s 4 months late!)
<3