May 17th, 2011
Building A Wardrobe and Demystifying Those Fashionable Girls
In my mind, I’m not a fashionable girl. I love putting together good outfits and I’ve even tried fashion blogging if only to push myself into being more comfortable with it, but in my mind that doesn’t cut it. When it comes to fashion, I look at the outfit posts I see on blogs and how the bloggers always look like they’ve just drifted into frame between a perfect walk in the park and a perfect evening out and a voice in my head says:
“You are not a fashionable girl, for fashionable girls it’s effortless”
{mayo w. on lookbook + ebba z. on lookbook}
I’m pretty convinced that voice belongs to the self defeating, jealous girl I could become if I didn’t check myself. I think we all have that tendency in ourselves to look at what other people do well and chalk it up to luck, good timing, or an innate instinct that we don’t possess. Sometimes it’s just easier to tell myself that I live in a world of different possibilities than to compare.
But in my heart I know better: nothing done well is effortless. And here I am with an interest in fashion, clothes that I get dressed in every morning, a pretty good eye for colour and proportion, and the determination to arm wrestle another shopper over a peter pan collar. If I want to make fashion a way that I express myself, there’s no reason not to do it and have fun with it!
There’s only one way that I know when it comes to this kind of a problem: planning!
Working With What I Have
The main problem that I’ve had with my clothes in the past year is that I haven’t been paying attention to what I have. I used to go shopping with a mental list of what I had in my closet, but over the past year I’ve stopped shopping for clothes for myself unless I’m on a trip. I’ve also stopped weeding out what doesn’t work for me in the clothes that I do have. The result is that many of my clothes are too worn to be cute, or they’re things that suited me when I was 20 or 21 but that should be out of my closet before I turn 26 next week.
Before I started buying anything, I decided to get a clear picture of what I love, and to work with what I have. While I know the kind of fashion that I love when I see it, I have no idea what that looks like all in one place, so I started a pinterest board called Looks I Love. After a little while of adding something in anytime I thought “I’d wear that!” it turns out that I do have a style after all!
Apparently I like casual looks that have a ‘worn in’ feel to them based in neutral colours, with playful pops of colour and accessories for personality. But somehow I would have never been able to articulate that until it materialized in front of me.
Now that I had a picture of the look I love, I wanted to get a picture of the balance I wanted in my wardrobe. I started rooting through what I own and saving the clothes that I really adore wearing while weeding out anything that doesn’t fit me (no excuses!) or that didn’t fit my style (again, no excuses!).
The idea was to make sure everything I own is something I will actually wear, and use it as the base for building my dream closet on. It will be 80% practical clothes that fit my personal style exactly and 20% magical clothes that I’ll always look fabulous in and that will possess the ability to turn any day around. Everything else has to go- I don’t want to do mediocre.
Finding the Gaps
Once I had pulled out what I didn’t want, it was easy to go through what I did have with more honesty. For example, it’s possible that I don’t like summer because I only own one pair of shorts and my skirts are all heavy and better suited for fall! Looking at my clothes I could see possibilities and limitations- a dress I never wear could be altered into a shirt that I would live in, and the umpteenth basic t-shirt that doesn’t fit right can find a new home.
I started to feel overwhelmed with the things I felt like I ‘needed’ to buy, so I listed out what my minimal dream wardrobe would contain. Once I got down to it, I was surprised that it broke down into a few manageable categories. It wasn’t nearly as scary as I thought it would be: a few new tops, comfortable summer skirt options, a pair of dressy sandals and a pair of go to summer shoes. If I bought one of each no and made the rest a work in progress that would be doable!
Some of what I’m waiting for in the mail: basic knit skirt from F21, Aldo sandals, boyfriend cotton shirt from F21, Toms Classics. I can’t wait to try them on!
For the rest of the summer I’m going to be keeping my 80/20 rule in mind, be ruthless about letting go of what doesn’t work, and investing here and there in quality instead of small impulse purchases every week (hello nail polish addiction!). And since part of what’s been a problem for me is not consistently buying things that work for me, I’m going to make it a rule to add one new piece a month instead so it’s a work in progress instead of an archive.
My new clothes should start arriving before my birthday, and who knows! Maybe next year I’ll be that fashionable girl- at least now I have one pair of the right shoes for the job.
Such a genius post, What a great way to look at what you want to wear and how you want to present yourself.
I love your blog. This post is so motivational and I was so intrigued by reading it, thank you! Feel free to visit my blog anytime. x
totally loved your post! a little intricate but very rational, and I can see my self in the same situation ehehe
i see the post is from 2011, i found it through stumbleupon. good stumble ;)
Francesca
http://www.sterlizie.com
Thanks for sharing this Kyla! What a great way to look at what you want to wear and how you want to present yourself.
love the Aldo sandals they are very cute
I really enjoyed this post. A lot of us aren’t necessarily fashionable but want to be more so. I notice that I tend to stick with things I’m ‘comfortable’ buying rather than trying things that might expand my woredrobe. Hard to invest the $ when you’re not used to wearing a certain thing. Hope you love your new finds!
You’re an inspiration! As soon as I get back to my apartment I’m going to purge my closet of all unnecessary items.
Here’s to being fashionable,
Gabby
you are adorable – love your style, and the creativity in this post. makes me want to try it myself!
Stumbled across the post via twitter and so pleased I did. This is such a wonderful, thoughtful post that I think many of us girlies can relate to. You have clearly spent time working on this, and your advice is inspring.
Thank you.x.
I totally can relate to this post. I have been working hard to pair down my wardrobe to clothes I really LOVE. YOu definitely putting what i have been thinking into words.
did you build that practical/magical pie chart? Because I freaking love it :)
lol You know I did! When I made it I thought you might enjoy it ;)
Umm – so, you’re kind of a genius! I’m feeling the same way about my current wardrobe – and it’s totally because I haven’t sat down and planned it out! that mental what’s-in-my-closet list totally isn’t cutting it anymore! Goodness. I can’t wait to see your closet grow & progress! i should do the same… :)
I love this post, but really, you’ve always had style so I don’t know what your talking about. I remember when we went for coffee a looong time ago and you were showing me your first few antique keys that you made into necklaces! Talk about being ahead of the times. Either way I think girls always enjoy sharing great fashion advice. I love all your purchases, especially the wedge sandals from aldo, they look great for patios and bike riding :)
Great post Kyla! I really love this. I find myself in dressy-ish (business casual) clothes all week for work and then on the weekend I tend to live in my workout clothes. Think lululemon and running shirts. Lol. I really need to find a casual, comfortable weekend style that I can pull off!
I hate shopping for clothes and think I have no style. I love your pinboard. Maybe I need to invest a little more time and effort into me.
Kyla I love this post! I feel like i have similar feelings. also, i have a bad habit of buying clothes I end up hating after a month because I was desperate for clothes or I thought I needed to try something new. i have a lot of things that i would get rid of in a heartbeat (like from that time I bought 4 of the same shirt at old navy)…except that it would leave my dresser 80% empty. but i also have a lot of things i love that are just plain worn out. it’s hard because i look fine in many styles and pieces of clothing..but they don’t necessarily feel like ‘me’.
I want to feel excited to pick out an outfit in the morning. slowly but surely i’m making over my wardrobe. i’ve been trying to thrift more carefully, i’m trying to think about what i want before i go into a store (new or thrifty), and i’m trying to ask myself if it’s ‘me’ or if i could make it ‘me’…really need to get that sewing machine going!
anyway, thanks a million for the re-inspiration…step one: i’m putting pinterest to work…http://pinterest.com/sagebrushcoast/i-d-wear-that/
KYLA. This is by far the most USEFUL blog entry about fashion and wardrobe choices that I have EVER read. I am so ASTOUNDED that I feel I must continue to EMPHASIZE my AMAZEMENT with excessive CAPSLOCK. I mean REALLY. Okay, enough of that. You are such a rad and smart chica! This is such a logical post, it seems obvious, but my weird little ADD brain would have never been able to come to these conclusions so easily.
Also, I was looking at some of your other pin boards, specially the Thrift Wish List one, and I saw a picture of opera glasses. I have recently come into possession of 4 pairs of antique opera glasses- I found them on the side of the road. Can you believe that?! I can’t figure out what to do with them, I don’t have an etsy or anything, but if you’re interested in a pair, we should talk.
I’m trying to do the same thing… have been for the last 6 months. It’s hard though as I have a weight loss goal and HATE buying clothes as I hope to not fit into them soon ;)
We’ll see how it all goes. It’s an adventure to be sure.
This is THE WORST. I have been working on getting more fit too, and after gaining a lot of weight over the winter my summer clothes felt a little like they were mocking me. I’m sticking to my guns though- if I don’t love it or it doesn’t fit, it’s out! I’m just going to pretend that they shrunk in the wash ;)
You can do it miss, you’ll get there and when you hit that goal the clothes will be an amazing part of the reward <3
I love your 80/20 rule! So clever.
I think we have the same style, too! ;)
Fab post, Kyla! You’ve definitely inspired me to tackle my monster of a closet!
I’m in no way fashionable but I do have a pair of Tom’s. You’ll love yours as much as I love mine, I’m sure of it.
I’ve found my biggest style challenge comes from being such an eclectic person. I’ve sort of learned to embrace it, but at times it still presents issues for me. Working for a shoe/clothing company has helped though, since I have to wear their clothes (which is not a problem since they’ve always been a favorite brand) I know what types of things are already in my closet when I go to shop other places.
I’ve also always been a big fan of purging my wardrobe, selling what I don’t wear or revamping something I would wear more if it was different. Plus, when I weed out those things it makes room for new stuff!
You are lovely, glad you found a way to make your style & fashion your own. ;)
great post! I have been “purging” since I got married 2 years ago and moved into a small apartment, started a new job, etc. it’s for sure a work in progress. one thing you mentioned too that has been a big help in saving me money is alterations…I have a “to alter” pile that I try to tackle. if it’s a simple hemline adjustment I do it myself, if it’s a little more challenging I take it to a seamstress.
my favorite alteration so far has been making some of my shorter “college” dresses into tunics…super fun to do and makes them perfect for work.
oh fun! I for one have to say that you totoally have style! I thought all of your looks were so pulled together when I saw you last year – and really played up your best features!
My focus right now is buying as many dresses (within reason) as I can so that I can get to the point where i wear dresses 4 days a week. I love dresses. It’s what I feel most comfortable, most attractive, and most powerful in. And they show off my best asset (my legs) and hide my trouble spot (my stomach).
I love this post, after having Aura I don’t fit half of my old clothes anymore – hello style crisis! Having a baby definitely makes me lean towards ‘practical’ more than my usual 5″ heels because hey, that MobyWrap doesn’t look match with everything!
“But in my heart I know better: nothing done well is effortless.” Love.
I need to work on this myself – and the pininterest board is genius because I too wouldn’t be able to tell you my style if you asked!
Oh god, you totally hit the nail on the head for me with this. I was really good at getting rid of things that don’t fit/I don’t wear but I’m at a standstill now when it comes to adding pieces to my wardrobe. I dig this 80/20 idea (and I should probably start utilizing my pinboards a bit more, well, organized ^^).
I can’t wait to see your ‘work in progress’ wardrobe! :D
The line about what making your wardrobe a work in progress, not an archive? I subscribe to that for sure. Big time. Or maybe I just have a shopping problem… :)
I’m a little too excited about relaxing in my work clothes starting May 31st with remote working; I’ll still put myself together but I don’t have to do black pants and button up shirts as much anymore. this makes me happy.
Can’t wait to see what your look evolves into; I’m always in love with it and jealous, so I’m sure you’ll be fabulous!
Whenever I look at personal style blogs, I feel the same way. Like how do these girls look so put together and so polished and how is their life so perfect! haha. But seriously, I have been contemplating my own personal style and what are the elements of my style. I love casual Vintage and retro pinup looks, just trying to make them work for every day life.
Also considering getting a camera crew to take amazing What I Wore photos!
Ha. I just kind of had to laugh when you said you didn’t consider yourself a “fashionable girl”, because I’m sure that’s how tons of us see you. Just shows that we all have these insecurities from time to time.
Have you read Style Statement? I’ve been working my way through it, and it’s really helping me to clarify my style and how it fits with my life and who I am at my deepest level. (I, too, keep building a Pinterest board with all my style likes, and it’s such fun to see a visual representation of what I want to wear.)
I’ve been wanting to get a pair of Toms for a while now. That colour is to die for. Perhaps this summer is the summer for cute, new shoes.
Love love love that you chose TOMS from the new summer collection! I have been reading your blog for well over a year and I had to delurk to thank you for your support (I work there).
No way, that’s so cool! I received my two (!) pairs stunningly quickly and they’re my new favourites :)
Thanks for being part of something so lovely!
Oh Kyla, you’re such an inspiration. I love this blog post. I own three pairs of jeans – one pair that doesn’t fit – and everything else is shirts and t-shirts. Half of the shirts are so worn and the other half don’t really fit “me” as in not my style. I don’t have the money right now to fix my wardrobe, but when I do, I will be relying on this post for help!
One of your best posts yet, lady (and that’s saying a lot for someone with such a killer blog). Love the mix of practicality and fun. You’re amazing.
Great post! Those are all great tips.
Such an amazing read, Kyla! So excited for your goodies to arrive so we can see some fashion posts. :)
My project for this summer is to create a closet where I love every. single. thing. *Toss. Donate. Sell.* I want to be able to walk in with my eyes closed, grab something, and know that I love it.
Thanks for sharing this.
Such a genius post, Kyla! You are inspiring me to start doing more thoughtful blogging. You’re just a genius at it. Better keep my inner jealous girl in check. ;) Loved reading this!
I’m in a similar boat, and I’ve written about it many times. Part of my problem is that I’ve been overweight for so long that I don’t really fit into the kinds of clothes that I really want to wear, or I’m always in the “But I’m losing weight so I’ll buy it later” mentality. Makes me not want to shop very much! I also purge frequently and I swear I’m always like “Where are all my clothes?” but that’s because I buy cheap clothes that tear or get stained or (because of the weight) I grow out of it, and so I end up either dumping it or hiding it in a box because it doesn’t fit.
I really need to get onto this pininterest bandwagon. It sounds wonderful!
I have lived the life of a casual college student for so long that jeans and t-shirts are such a staple in my closet. I’m trying to branch out and buy more dresses and cute tops, but it’s hard not to be drawn to my comfort zone. This post makes me want to join on the Pinterest bandwagon!
Dangit! I have resisted requesting a Pinterest invite until I read this post. The way you use it to center your wardrobe is an excellent idea. Love it!
Such a good idea to use Pinterest to narrow down what your personal style is! I recently purged my closet of all of the clothes that a lady-in-her-late-twenties shouldn’t be wearing and holy crap I couldn’t believe what had been buried in the depths. Clothes I hadn’t worn since high-school; bar star clothes that I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing around my OWN house now; and a multitude of t-shirts & tank tops that had perhaps only been worn once or twice since being purchased (many a moon ago).
Do you find that you (subconsciously) get stuck wearing the same couple of pieces all of the time, or do you try to wear something different from your closet everyday?
This is such a good process to go through! I have a weird scattergun approach to buying clothes, which ends up with me having too many fancy dresses and not enough day to day wear. My body has also changed a bit lately so it’s definitely time for me to do a wardrobe inventory.
PS. mmm, toms! I love em and those green ones are super cute.
Seriously inspiring! I do this sort of thing mentally but don’t have the action to back it up. While I am adding and planning my wardrobe, I am not purging enough and then I end up right back where I started. Thank you for posting this, Kyla! You are a smart lady.
This post is great, Kyla, and I love the Pinterest board.
My problem with being fashionable is: I see things on other people and think “Wow, this looks so amazing and put together”… and then I buy something for myself, put it on and go “Well, when I wear it, it doesn’t look half as good as on the other person”. This happens a lot. It’s so frustrating.
How do you find a style that works for YOU?
I think it’s really important to make sure that you have personal style inspiration that matches your body type- which is why I think finding a fashion blogger who’s a similar shape as you are can be really fun. You can make them a person to learn from, and watch the kind of clothes that work for them.
Another thing to keep in mind is finding clothes that highlight the right proportions for you- I know that I’m mostly leg, which makes long cardigans look really silly on my already short torso, and many skirts not super appropriate. Knowing your body type and how to dress for it can be a big help. There are lots of guides out there, but just quickly I googled around and found this, you can use it to look for details in cloths that will be more flattering. I hope it helps! :)
Love this post :) Motherhood has turned me into such a frump, at least in my own eyes – I really need to clean out my closet! I wish I could shop online (it would make my life SO much easier!) but I’m so small that what looks good on a model online will look absolutely ridiculous on me. When I shop, I go to pretty much every (young) woman’s store at West Edmonton Mall, try on a million things – and find 1 or 2 that fit. Maybe it’s not motherhood that makes me a frump, it’s the fact that I hate shopping and usually buy the first thing that fits :)
Great Post Kyla!! I am a jeans and t-shirt girl myself and have recently gotten into fashion blogs. As I’m getting older, I realize that I don’t have a personal style. I love your advice to get a clear picture of what I love. I’m all over the place if I don’t. F21 makes me cringe because I’m bombarded with all these styles! Thanks for the tips. P.S- I am currently obsessed with TOMS. They are so comfy!
I love pinterest for this type of thing!
I cleared out my wardrobe a couple months ago and I felt so free.I think I need to do it every season so that when I open it up, I can just wear anything on the hanger (unless PMS is tricking me into having a meltdown about my clothes/body).
Excellent post Kyla! I love this idea of using a Pinterest board as real-life inspiration. I think I might hop on over and start a “I’d Wear That” board right now :)
Wow wow wow, your blog is the bomb.
I am going through the same thing. I just purged my whole closet and have been left with only a few things.
The problem? Cash. :D
I totally hear you! I definitely recommend leaving enough in your closet to cover your basics, or organizing a clothing swap with friends so when you’ve finished your purge you can add in more options for yourself for free. :)